shoebox sanctuary.

03 Feb 2011 21 Comments

by mary kathryn tyson in life abundant.

a friend pointed out the other day that i tease about my tiny space. that is, what i refer to as my ‘shoebox’ apartment, which is about 150 square feet.

{which, honestly, i have no idea of the measurement and i am sure it’s bigger than 150 square feet. it may be 151.}

it has felt small to me because i can’t have more than a few people visit at a time before it becomes crowded. my barn-table that i aschewed from the big house only seats two, comfortably (four if we squeeze).

anyone who knows me well knows i love to throw parties and entertain, so it’s been a little disappointing not to be able to do that in my little bungalow except on a small scale.

and by ‘small’, i mean ‘dinner for two’.

still, i love my shoebox.

besides, my sister lives down the street for me and is my best friend, so we’ll have folks over there, squelching any need i have to entertain on a grander scale.

i also seem to have forgotten that, as much as i loved living in the big house in the country, it was a lot of work to clean by myself and could get lonely. it was also easy to scare myself living there alone.

i had apologized to my friend who is coming to visit in a few weeks because my apartment is so…como se dice…cozy? but she, a loyal wife and keeper of children who lives in a comfortable old home, is looking forward to the respite of her living space and the quietness of mine. it’s what, she says, draws her.

what i took for granted is that my little shoebox is my sanctuary. it’s not meant for entertaining, but for comforting souls.

it’s a generous shelter where secrets are safe and hearts are protected, including my own.

a place few enter, but all are welcome.

i sit on my couch and his words come alive and he speaks to my heart.

my head rests peacefully there and i wrap up well in his consuming love in this sacred space that is mine to guard.

for now.

i have desired a home of my own and suddenly realize i have one. alone, i need no bigger {but please, no smaller} haven for my dreams, a covering for my heart, a dwelling place for my wishes and hopes and thoughts and quiet prayer.

in my sanctuary, i am home.